I have come to notice that there are a lot of Jesus loving blogs on this blogger account. Like there is a mature feeling of spirituality. Then comes the mommy blogs, or the blogs that pertain to family or blogs dedicated to their little bundle of joy.
I don't have a bundle wrapped up, nor do I have a strong attachment to the lord. I just write. I just belong to writing. That and food, and reading. And maybe some good television if the occasion calls for it.
Although I do feel as though I should bring myself closer to Jesus and God, but given the agnostic viewpoints that I have grown up with (even though I was raised Catholic and go to a Seventh Day Adventist school), I have never truly opened up and studied a bible. Even my brother, who is recently trying to study Buddhism, has tried to get into a certain religion that he feels comfortable practicing.
I still need to find that religion which brings me a spiritual understanding to bring me closer to God. I mean, He has done so much for me, and has taught me well (to be good I mean). I am indebted to His service. But I still feel that distance between God and myself. I am just not comfortable to fully commit myself to servicing God, but I still pray from time to time.
I pray to Jesus and God to keep me safe, grant me certain wishes, but more than anything I pray for my family and loved ones, even though I selfishly do so. I never give thanks for all that He has given me, but I know deep down he understands. It's still not time for me to get into that spiritual funk. For now, I'll just pray.
Praying is still praying isn't it?
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